of the devil

day by day, during trainings, i just wonder to myself.

what the hell am i doing here? why cant i just go home and enjoy my life simply? looking at those 8-5(normal working hours) NSF just really made me think that i could just give up and have 8-5 NS life for the rest of my service. its just some devil telling me to give up. something that whispers to the ear, something that makes you weak, something that makes you think of many ways to chaokeng and what more.

but importantly the mind has to be set the right way. its just the beginning actually. theres alot more to come to test one's will and i know im not the only one whos whining. time is actually flying fast but the fact that im not out there with my family and friends make me think that im losing them. i do miss civilian life.

i know i know. dont give up, endure, blahblahblahblahblahblah x 1000.

officer cadets are highly self-motivated ppl but these are just some soldier's whining believe it or not. soldiers that dont whine are not human. prolly they dont whine infront of you or they just dont want to show their feelings.

but i will always keep this in mind: "if one chooses to lead an easy life, one will never grow"

its good to be back home. section field camp next week.i really dont know what to expect but now its a good time to prepare myself mentally.

and friends out there reading this, lets hang out soon. =D but u plan la, u think i got time to plan meh? your head ah!

of a vision

its gone and i cant find it now.

the fire. which was once so bright and strong, is now dying. im tired. or maybe i just dont have it in myself anymore. im not gonna give up easily yet the journey im going thru will be meaningless. i must find it back.

that is why my friends, that in life, you must have your own vision.

"without clear alignment in your life, ppl still do their work but lack the determination, trust and enthusiathism. in the long run, they either leave or produce only for the preservation of their job."

im sure all of us agree to this.

a vision statement is an expression of HOPE and if we have no hope, there will be no vision. it is something you create and continue to re-create throughout your life.

dont just study for the sake of studying. dont just work because of money. dont just do something to pass time. have a vision guys. a vision can give meaning to life in the most difficult of situations, which made me pull through my BMT and made my way to OCS. i know some of you are reading this and nodding your head but remember,

a vision with no action - a dream
an action with no vision - passing time
a vision and action - changes the world.

i must rekindle this fire. i must make it strong again. i have always depended on hope.
and hope is what i need now.

of the final hours

And remember me tonight
When your asleep
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find


tmr is the start.
start of all things that i have hoped for.
confidence. endurance. perseverance.
9months fiq. 9 months. its just like the start of this year till now.
well. yeah. it looked short.
i know this is the test.
test of the best.
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and i will give my best.

take care everyone. =)

RAWR.

of another chapter

OCS. To Lead, To Excel and To Overcome.

i'm kinda nervous yet very excited for my next 9 months of training. definitely everyone is. i remember the only thing that made me go through the first 2 weeks confinement was the thought of going back home to see my loved ones and of course the prata at The Prata House. haha. i guess, honestly, i would need alot of motivation from alot of you guys out there and i wont just say for myself, but also motivate the rest of the OB ppl as well. OCS - Ben, Joe, JJ, YongJie, Kelvin and those SISPEC guys, Kaihoow and JunWei.

these are the times when words of encouragement are gold and keeps ppl going. just like during my field camp when i received a letter from my parents. we soldiers dont do this for ourselves but for you guys out there, protecting the lifestyle that we have right now. (like going thru war now like that haha)

anyways. 9months is not an easy feat. but the reasons that join OCS will still be strong.

-pride, making loved ones and friends proud
-honestly the money LOL
-to inspire ppl when i commission.

tough times dont last. tough men do. so lets do this FIQ!

TO LEAD, TO EXCEL AND TO OVERCOME.

RAWRS.

of marking the end of BMT

POP LO!

haha. 11days block leave. left with 4 more days. sucks. so fast. sigh. will know my posting on the 19th. hopefully its want i want. if cannot, nvm, gotta stay positive. anyways.

JAGUAR COY CHAMPIONS LO!

haha. we won Recruit's Night performance and Games Day. Recruit's Night is a night for a few of the companies from the same school will get together and performances from selected companies will be performed on stage. obviously i was a part of the performance for Jaguar Coy and i told myself that if my company gets selected to perform for the Recruit's Night, i'll go all out. like. all out la.

so our performance was about a fashion show. its about modifying our uniforms to suit ourself during our trainings la. so we had 5 models. yes im one of them. my design was called the Gay Slack. what i did was i wore a swimming trunks and folded a tshirt that looks like a bra and boots. they say really look damn gay >.> so i went all out by making that swimming trunks to something like a gstring la, so u can actually see the sexaayy butt cheeks. >.> then my designer went to smack it real hard till got echo all over the MPH.

we thought we wouldnt win it because Yankee and Falcon did a great job too. but too bad Kelvin(performed for Yankee), Jaguar will always win you guys. LOL. (btw all of it was super impromptu). :D anyways. mixed feelings about POP. happy yet sad. im really gonna miss my buddies, going thru thick and thin with blood, sweat and tears together.


JAGUAR COY!





bed buddies








platoon best,
2nd best,
3rd best.

of pushing yourself to the limit

finally got my silver for 4th ippt.

sbj: 225cm
2.4km: 10:16min

now the question is, can i push to gold in a week? all seems far fetched. i need 9cm more and need to run 32secs faster. i know ive been trying for gold. but its never easy. hell, nothing is ever easy in this world. you want something, you work hard for it. i had only 5 days to train between my 3rd ippt(which i got a pass) and my 4th ippt just because i miss silver by 4cm :(

so my scores for all the statios were 5 5 5 5 3. haha. really pushed hard to get a 5 point for 2.4km.

maybe a silver is just enough. maybe...

of the outside life