gosh. it feels like i have been screwed.

started the day with a happy note, but now, wow. fuck is the best word to describe it.

i dont wanna end the day feeling like this.

but sometimes, i guess, u just gotta suck it up and move on.

family

what can i say. i love my family.














dad and mum.

i wanted dad to pose what he did earlier. mum asked him to guard her handbag while she goes food hunting and he immediately grabbed a knife and gave the serious face while looking left and right. lol it was hilarously funny but he refused to pose it, saying "being random is the best pose".

so mum tried to mimic it. :S















bro and I. always the same pose. haha.

the food was great. alot of choices la. jap to indo to chinese to western to italian to whatever country. i feel like im advertising for them already. lol. i just cherish the moments whenever we are out for dinner together. :D

i need to start studying. been out the whole week. oh well.

instead of spamming in my own tagboard, replies to tags here again.

jacq: what? what thing you?? :O:O:O:O:O:O:O

aifang: conference? why u love conferencing so much sia. is it because u like to talk alot? HAHA. >.>

midori: oh noes the naughty midori is here! /run

clem: i went to the mirror and tried doing it. and instead of rawring, i lmao-ed. :D and call me fiq. how rude.

yingjia: aww so sweet, rawr with me. but i bet ure gonna be shy, as usual!

look at the stars, look how they shine for you
and everything you do.

coldplay

RAAAAAWWWWRRRRR.

i wanted to scream but that would wake people up. i shall find a good spot one day to scream my lungs out.

so i tried to find a pic of myself "rawring" but all i see is smiles. next time i know what to pose already. so i found this pic. cute seh















the movie Time Machine actually made me realised something that i will always remember from tonight onwards. you can't make change the past but you can always change the future.

running away from the past wont change the fact that i end up running in circles. but i must say this tho, it brought my confidence level down so low, its hard to pick myself up. i guess its never too late to start now. hell, its NEVER TOO LATE to start anything. i kinda miss the old syafiq. the one who knows he has nothing to lose, do or die attitude and make people smile. =)

thanks to the people who tagged. im muchhh better now =)

clem&derrick: even tho i knew u guys for a few months, it feels like we have been friends for years, thanks =)

garrick: lol. SMILE SMILE SMILE. :D

farand: its rare to find u tagging. but thanks bro! :P

mirza: yeah man the world is there for us to explore, if we dont dare to try, we will never know. thanks dude!

aifang: you and your damn crows. u think u crowgirl ah, haha! thanks girl!

deep inside

wednesday, 6/2/08.

(4:10 PM) !ĐêŖЯĭcK!™ It is: you know the song that i had on my blog last week?
(4:10 PM) !ĐêŖЯĭcK!™ It is: breathless by shayne ward
(4:10 PM) - sarcazz. itch: that song
(4:10 PM) - sarcazz. itch: also send me
(4:10 PM) - sarcazz. itch: i emo already
(4:10 PM) - sarcazz. itch: fuck u all
(4:10 PM) - sarcazz. itch: lol
(4:11 PM) mirza...: wahhhh
(4:11 PM) mirza...: and yet you are the one who said you'll share
(4:11 PM) mirza...: hahaha
(4:11 PM) !ĐêŖЯĭcK!™ It is: relax man...

friday, 8/2/08.

to be honest, im still emo. i truly hate looking back. im still trying to get out of the hell hole. ironically, the genius of the hole: No matter how long u spend climbing out, you can still fall back down in an instant.

sigh.
fiqq.
wtf.
are.
you.
doing.










and watching The Time Machine now on tv isnt helping much. the girl he loves die, and he makes a time machine to bring her back, but she keeps dying. :(

nothing but experiences

not gonna post details about the training camp because i want the others who may read this to have a clear mindset of what to come during 23rd/24th. if you're really interested, TOO BAD. >.> but got photos la. from ben's phone cam which almost drowned.

























































































































































after reaching the base of the Pelepah Waterfalls after the River Tracing & Trekking, Ben, Yu Heng, Nino(the camp chief) and I decided to run back to the base campsite. it was already 7pm la so the 4 of us decided to run so that we could shower and makan first. the rest were smokers and didnt join us >.>

most of you know 7pm in Malaysia get really dark already, and the roads there had no lights at all. so we just kept running and running and running and running for quite some time, enduring the pain from blisters and stones in the shoes and not knowing exactly where the campsite will be. again, it was a new experience, and VERY FUN.

nothing much during the second day, low elements and Indiana Jones. man Indiana Jones alone leave me bruises, cuts, splinters and bicep and arm aches just because i wanted to hold on to my dear life lol.

i also realised something about this trip, that my passion for the outdoors is strong, just like my passion for sports. and when u do things that you are passionate about, it will be fun. no matter how tough it is, no matter the bruises and cuts u suffer, no matter the obstacles u face, no matter how much money you make, in the end you have fun.

alot of stars to see also. sadly no one else was interested and i couldnt part my knowledge. so i was star gazing alone :(
but i spotted the whole of Orion, Small Dipper with the north star. :D
gonna bring my notes of constellations next time because i keep forgetting.

for it is in my heart

yesterday night was really a sad night, for i am 'graduating' from this great CCA.
but im happy too, for i know that NPOB will achieve greater heights in the hands of the 15th comm.

OB OI.
OB OI.
OB OI.

memories will always be in my heart, for NPOB is in my heart. =)












and i have a flu now because of the last training and im going for an instructor training camp for Asia Outdoor tomorrow.

good luck to me. lol

just one of the them

its just one of the nights for me, when the body is so damn tired but the mind is still very much active.

and when the mind is very much active, i just wish someone would punch me straight to the face so i can stop thinking too much and just knockout and fall asleep.

do you know you cant suffocate yourself with a pillow? you will just fall unconscious.
do you know that yawning is very contagious? i just saw 5 consecutive yawns from 5 different ppl on the way home.
do you know when you think about sad things all the time, you will die faster?
do you know that breakfast is a very important meal of the day? your body tends to work better with breakfast.
do you know that breakfast is considered breakfast if you eat within 1.5hours AFTER you wake up?
do you notice that im always speechless sometimes? because there was nothing in my mind but you.

lol RANDOM right. this is why i said i hate it when the mind is so active at night. also, try this...

being happy doesn't make you smile, but smiling makes you happy. =)

so SMILE u emo bastards. =)

=)=)=)=)=)