of clearing the air

I decided to enforce a few things back in the office last Thursday. I wasn't being harsh. I just wanted things to be fair for both parties. So two colleagues posted something pretty ugly in facebook and I thought it was directed at me. Of course, like i mentioned i "thought".

So I decided to clear the air. One should never be afraid to face your opponents.

Turned out it wasn't me but we had a good talk in the end and at the same time telling them to understand my situation. Its never good to be the middle man to be honest. All my intentions were never bad, they were good.

And I hope both parties understand this.

ANYWAY. COUNTDOWN LO. Who needs an application/software/countdown timer when you have the newpaper counting down for you everyday? :P

(coincidentally, my ORD falls on the start of the World Cup)

:D

of disappointment

Sometimes you try to make an effort to change certain things - you end up disappointed anyway.

The problem doesn't lie with the people or myself. Change IS the problem.

I know some shit's so hard to swallow,

But I can't just sit back and wallow

in my own sorrow

but I know one fact,

I'll be one tough act to follow.

of ...

I guess it's official.

All I can do now is smile and pretend that everything's the same.

If you're happy, then I wish you well because I have been a coward.

Let's start all over again eh, fiq?

of being an instructor

It's been a week since I came back from St. Theresa's Convent Pulau Ubin Camp. To be honest, the girls were wonderful. After a 2 year hiatus, I was back in the business. Working as an instructor is far more fulfilling than any other jobs I have taken up so far. Of so many camps that I have done, this was the only camp that had the most impact on me and of course, I almost cried - multiple times.

I had to serve the girls.

I had to carry alooot of logistics for the events.

I had to teach.

I had to boost their morale.

I had to do many other things that at the end of the night, I felt satisfied of my achievements.

But importantly, when I decided I would take up the job, I had only one goal in mind - To change their lives or at most, give them the best ever camp experience of their lifetime. Thanks to my mirror instructor and attached instructor, we worked together to achieve our common goal.

The best feeling ever?

It wasn't the time to sleep.

It wasn't the time I could rest.

It wasn't the time I was all alone in my own world.

It was when the girls and their teacher approached me to say one simple word.

"Thanks." - with the best ever sincerity they could ever show me when I look in their eyes.

And to me, it wasn't about the money when I did the job.

But I won my kind of million dollars. :)

of another song

of two values

I have to be honest. The past three days were hectic and mind draining. I can't believe that it's Thursday already.

I hate it when very clear instructions were given out weeks before and people don't heed them. And because of these people, I have to wait for their submissions and work even harder to meet the deadline. My colleague said this "Two values that people will never change. Stupidity and Stubbornness."

but I'm glad the impossible became possible. Job's done and I need a break. But no... more things coming up.

3 more months to ORD. and my Commander said this to me before I left his room.

"Syafiq, don't ORD ok."

I smiled, shook my head, and walked away.

and i realised today that i'm kinda lonely. :/

of your thinking

Sometimes I wonder,

Why am I tanking all the big events when the other is just doing a simple task.

Why am I doing this when the other can eat his lunch and I can't.

Why am I wearing that rank which people will always look up to me and ask me the 5 W and 1 H.

Everyday I ask myself these questions.

If one could change one's thinking, the world can be different.

Just imagine.

It starts to pour heavily on a beautiful day.

Person A might feel "Arghhh I hate the rain"

Person B might feel "Wow good weather for once!"

You see, that's just a simple example. But I hope I make my point.

That what you feel is what you think.

Everyday I will think that I am the right man for the job.

Everyday I will think that people trust in me and that's why they ask these questions.

Everyday I will think on how to make people happy.

And I don't go

"Ah Fuck my Life, everything I also kena"

"Why is the work bearing me dowwwnnnn"

"Why are you people asking me sooo many questions when I am so busy?!"

If I am beating around the bush, I am saying that,

Your thinking can change who you are.

Think about it.